Lately....

Lately, I have been in what you may call a funk. My life, since Ayden has been born, has been extremely hectic. I was sick, then Ayden was sick, then we packed up and moved across the state. When we moved, I was so excited. I would be were there was daycare available at the gym, so I could actually go work out. I was done having babies, so now I would have time to make friends. I would have neighbors that were my age and not retirees. My husband would be home every night. All of these bubbles were popped in about 2 weeks time.

I guess my biggest blow was finding out I was pregnant again. I know it is a blessing but it is still very hard for me to wrap my mind around. In my head, I was done. I had my family and was quite content. I still get very overwhelmed thinking about have an infant, a 1 yr. old, a 3 yr old, a 6 yr old and an 8 yr. old. Right now there never seems to be enough of me to go around. To add someone else who needs me just blows my mind. Add to this, that now Jeremy works in Houma and it just gets more overwhelming by the minute. Now don't get me wrong, Jeremy is home every night but Houma is 2 hours from our house. So he is lucky to be home by 5:30 or 6 in the afternoon.

Now I know my life is not horrible and I have tons to be grateful for but these few things really sent me down. I have a hard time thinking about making friends because I would be a horrible friend. I spend so much time taking care of my family, I barely have time for myself. So I have basically pouted for the last month.

Next week starts a new week and hopefully a new outlook for me. I will be 15 weeks pregnant and I can not spend the rest of this pregnancy feeling sorry for myself. I am going to work harder at trying new things around here and being more active. God has blessed me in an abundance and I am very grateful for all of it.

I am not sure why I have written all of this. Maybe just so those other mom's out there that feel overwhelmed like me know that they are not alone. Maybe I feel like if I write down my new outlook, I am more likely to follow through with it. My new verse is
" I can do all things through Christ who strengtheneth me." Philippians 4:13

Saying Good bye

Last week we lost a very important member of our family. Our dog, Ava. Ava has been Caroline's dog for 4 yrs now. We got her for Caroline's 4th birthday from some people down the street who were giving away free puppies. She was the sweetest dog any of us have every had. This was Jeremy and I 's first experience of parenting a child through the loss of a beloved pet. It was definitely one of those days, we wished our kid came with a manuel.

Her day started out normal with us letting her out of the garage to go back to the back yard. I looked out several times that day and saw her playing in the backyard. That night Jeremy went out to feed her and everything seemed fine. 15 minutes later, he went back out to bring her in for the night and she was dead. The best the vet can figure without autopsy is that her intestines flipped and she died suddenly.

We all cried! In fact, we still tear up b/c she is not there when we open our back door. She was so wonderfully obedient and sweet. When we would bring the boys outside when they were babies, she would sit at the foot of thier jumpers or swings like she was babysitting them. She is and always will be missed.

Here are some memories of our favorite pooch: